Crestfallen is a weird word

Today on a walk through the breezy neighborhood, I used the word “crestfallen” to describe the feeling I had in my stomach. It was about a relationship I have with someone.

The Love has a unique way of finding you and pointing you in the right direction. But one has to recognize it first. It is finding, recognizing and following these signs that is most difficult. My personal weakness lies in submitting control.

I find such confidence in the things I do, I lose sight of the fact that I am on a ride. I am not navigating the carts, however. I often subconsciously choose to ignore this because I like believing that I can bend things that are unbendable.

Today, not 30 minutes after a truthful and enlightening walk my iTunes, chose from 41 days of music, The Smashing Pumpkins’ tune “Crestfallen”.

Thanks, Love!


Crestfallen – Smashing Pumkins

Who am I to need you when I’m down?
Where are you when I need you around?
Your life is not your own

And all I ask you
Is for another chance
Another way around you
To live by circumstance, once again

Who am I to need you now?
To ask you why, to tell you no
To deserve your love and sympathy
You were never meant to belong to me

And you may go, but I know you won’t leave
Too many years built into memories
Your life is not your own

Who am I to need you now?
To ask you why, to tell you no
To deserve your love and sympathy
You were never meant to belong to me

Who am I to you?
Along the way
I lost my faith

And as you were, you’ll be again
To mold like clay, to break like dirt
To tear me up in your sympathy
You were never meant to belong to me
You were never meant to belong to me
You were never meant to belong to me

Who am I?